Fractured Fairy Tales
by ProxyoftheMuse
Summary: After falling asleep while attempting to read a fairy tale book, Manny and Frida find themselves in the exact bizarre situations of the characters from the stories. How will our heroes cope with this outlandish adventure?
1. Prologue

**I love modern interpretations of fairytales, especially when characters from another media source reenact them. The plot was inspired by two episodes from two different shows. Arthur's "Just Desserts", and The Suite on Deck's "Once Upon a Suite Life" in which the main characters from both shows dream up their own version of classic fairy tales.**

 **Just a little disclaimer before we begin: This is a parody, so if any of the original stories seem inaccurate, random, or twisted to any of you, well, that's the point. My only concern about sticking to the original source material is making sure all the characters are in character. Enjoy, and please remember constructive criticism is welcome!**

 **And of course, I don't own El Tigre or any of it's main characters. Except for Señora Rodriguez who isn't even going to be shown or mentioned after this chapter.**

Friday. If any of the youngsters can agree on one thing, it's that it is the best day of the week for everybody. Three whole days dedicated just relaxing without a single care in the world for anything. Especially not school. Sadly, the same could not be said for two certain individuals.

Manny and Frida spent the school day as they typically do. Not paying attention to a single thing any of their teachers said, and today seemed to be lucky. Nobody said anything to them as they gabbed away. Of course it all ended when they slept throughout their whole English class. Unsurprisingly, their teacher, Señora Rodriguez wasn't too pleased with her students' slacking, or any of their other actions this past week from making paper airplanes and spitballs out of their worksheets to spiking her coffee with jalapeño sauce, and made them stay after class where they did various actions to redeem themselves. Writing lines, clapping erasers, and washing the teacher's car. The gruesome hour finally ended and just as Manny and Frida darted out of the classroom, Señora Rodriguez stopped them when they were only two inches away from the door. For some reason, that sadistic woman decided that since they fell asleep through today's lesson, it was only fair that they make it up by taking the assignments that they failed to do in school home with them. Having to do extra homework over the weekend was bad enough, but the topic that they were assigned…

"Fairytales?!" exclaimed Manny angrily as he slammed the door to his house open, "Does Señora Rodriguez think we're babies or something?"

"Dude, I know!" agreed Frida as she followed him, slamming the door shut. "It's just not enough for her to torture us at school." the duo sat down on the couch and stared at the heavy book that they received from their teacher in disgust.

"I remember when my parents used them read them to me when I was little. I can't believe how scared I was of them."

"They're so lame!" laughed Frida. "We won't ever need them in life, let's go to the arcade!"

"Not today." Manny shook his head. "We really need to get this assignment done."

"Manny!" gasped Frida at her best friend's uncharacteristic moment. "What has Señora Rodriguez done to you?!"

"Let's just get this over with." grumbled Manny as he picked up the book and flipped to a random story. "Once upon a time…" he began reading in a dejected monotone and that was already enough to have the two amigos close their eyes, slump against each other, and snore. They slowly drifted into a deep sleep, completely unaware of what is to come.

 **Yes I know it was short, . I don't know exactly how often I'm going to update this. Along with being a writer, I am a full time college student so I'm a pretty busy bee. Well at least I know which fairy tale I'm gonna start with. Hansel and Gretel!**

 **Also, if any of you have some suggestions to make, don't be shy! Feel free to share them! I am still trying to determine which El Tigre characters would work best for the fairy tale characters.**


	2. Hansel and Gretel Part 1

**I decided to start with Hansel and Gretel because I just feel as if Manny and Frida are a shoe-in for their roles. And I like the idea of them reacting to old-timey clothes like lederhosen. Enjoy!**

Manny was roused by the sound of woodland animals, and the feeling of his back pressing against something hard, through the cracks of his barely open eyes, he took in the blurry green, brown, and blue shapes around him. Thinking nothing of it and deciding to catch up on his sleep, he shrugged, and relaxed against the tree he was leaning on. Wait, tree? Blurry green and brown colors? This didn't seem right. Manny once again opened his eyes, this time, fully and cautiously scoping out his surroundings. They were in a forest. But how? He didn't remember some villain kidnapping them and they weren't doing El Oso another favor either. _This is too weird_ thought Manny, looking down at Frida who laid curled up next to him.

"Frida?" Manny shook his friend's shoulder to wake her in order to confirm that she saw the forest too and this was not some illusion that he was under.

"Huh?" Frida woke up mid-snore, wiping the little bit of drool dripping from her mouth. Upon opening her eyes, she glanced at their surroundings with as much confusion as Manny. "Where are we?" she caught a glimpse of their attire. "And what are we wearing?" the punk rock tomboy stared at her new outfit: a white, puffy-sleeved blouse with red flowers embroidered at the neckline, a black, loosely-tied corset vest, red knee-length skirt, white stockings, and clogs. Her blue hair was tied in pig-tails and her red goggles were replaced with a white bonnet.

Upon hearing Frida's question, Manny looked down at his own clothes. "AHH! Where's my belt?!" he asked in horror. He was decked out in a white shirt with elbow-length sleeves, chocolate brown lederhosen that exposed the bottom of his legs, gray knee socks, and black loafers. Much to his displeasure, Frida was laughing hysterically at his distasteful expression,

"Nice pants Manny. Where's the flood?"

"I look like such a dork!"

"Hey, at least something's holding them up."

"RIVERA, SUAREZ!" the two of them jumped in fear as they heard an all too-familiar voice.

Standing behind them was Vice Principal Chakal, with his usual look of anger. "Your anarchy ends now! I will not have you two ruin this field trip for the other children!"

"We're on a field trip?" Manny asked Frida, who wore the same confused expression on her face.

"Not anymore! I am taking you two to a reform school!"

The two teens gasped in unison.

"In the deep part of the forest!"

"NOOOOOO!" they screamed as they hugged each other tightly.

…

"Are we there yet?" groaned Frida as she dragged her feet on the ground. She and Manny have lost track of how long they've been walking. Who had an actual concept of time in the olden days anyway?

"No talking!" barked Chakal as he led the two students. "The sooner we get to our intended location, the sooner I will be rid of you! I mean, rid of your rambunctious behavior. Now keep quiet! The school should be around the corner."

"Wait a minute," Manny realized something fishy was going on. "How can you send us to reform school without talking about it to our parents first?"

"Yeah, and do they even know about it?" Frida added

Chakal began to sweat, struggling to find a legit explanation. "Look, a thing!" Chakal pointed to the sky, ignoring the kids' question.

"Where?!" Manny and Frida inquired as they looked up the direction, abandoning any of their earlier suspicion. Once the children were distracted, Chakal grinned evilly and tip-toed away.

"Dang!" Frida snapped her fingers, annoyed that she fell for that old trick again.

"Uh Frida," Manny tapped his best friend on the shoulder. "Where's Chakal?" he gestured towards the empty spot where their vice principal was standing. As if on cue, they heard him running away and laughing triumphantly, slowly fading out of their sight and hearing.

"He left us!" growled Frida."Dude, I know he hates us, but that's just too sadistic even for him! Now how are we gonna get out of here?"

"Don't worry! I thought there was something weird going on, so I made a trail out of the churro bits I randomly found in my pocket!"

As if to confirm the ingenuity of this plan, Frida let out a small burp. "Oh. They were important?". she nervously giggled as Manny glared at her.

"Okay, we'll just have to try to find our own way out!" declared Manny. "It can't be that hard!"

…

It was that hard. Night fell quickly and as the hours ticked by. Any chances that the duo had of making it out of the forest were quickly short-lived when they returned to familiar sights.

"So c-c-cold…" shivered Frida. "So _hungry._ "

Finally, Manny couldn't take it anymore. "I can't believe this! We wake up in the middle of a field trip we don't even remember going on, get abandoned in the woods, and we've been walking in circles for hours! CAN THIS GET ANY WORSE?!"

"Manny, look!" Frida beamed, pointing to a distant but distinct tan shape with a light beamed down on it and an angelic choir singing in the background.

"It's a house!"

"Made entirely out of CHURROS!"

On instinct, the duo zipped to the pastry abode, eyes widening and glimmering in admiration of the sight. It was even better looking up close. The hot, fresh smell and twinkling of the sugar and cinnamon was already enough to beckon them.

"Well, let's dig in!"

"Frida! This is somebody's house, you can't jus-" before Manny could finish his lecture, Frida had already ripped off a piece of the window and started eating it. "Extra hot, extra delicious." She sighed in content. "Manny, try one!"

"Well… Maybe just a little." If you can't beat them, join them.

…

After they gobbled up most of the house, Manny and Frida leaned against what remained of the wall, rubbing their full stomachs happily and occasionally letting out huge belches.

"Well, that takes care of our hunger problem!" Manny gladly proclaimed.

"Yeah, this should give us all the strength and hyperactivity needed to keep going!"

"Why hello children." they duo panicked as they heard a raspy falsetto greet them. Their eyes widened in panic when they found who they assumed to be the owner of the house, an old woman with a shriveled up and warty face, approaching them. She had ruffled gray hair like a scarecrow's and a generous amount of facial hair above her upper lips.

"We can explain!" Frida started their usual round of excuses.

"Hypnosis!"

"Pixie dust!"

"A ghost possessed us!"

The old woman only chuckled and flashed them a grin that showed off her crooked teeth. "No explanation is needed children. I'm grateful to have found some _tasteful_ critics."

"Oh right.. your house." Manny guiltily twiddled his thumbs together. "Sorry about that."

"Oh that's nothing." the old woman brushed off the compliment. "I have a much nicer home with far more luxuries. Would you two like to come see?"

"I dunno…" Manny scratched his head suspiciously. "An strange, old lady who we never met before inviting us to her house upon sight? Something about this just seems _very_ shady."

"Oh, that's too bad. I suppose I'll just have to let all those video games, endless junk food, and the brand new churro maker collect dust."

Upon hearing those words, the duo's impressions immediately went from alert to happily obliging. "SOLD!"

…

After abandoning any previous suspicion of the old woman, Manny and Frida immediately settled into their sanctuary. They spent the last few hours playing video games and gobbling down on any more junk food that has been offered to them.

Unbeknownst to the oblivious pair, the old woman had slipped outside the room, the kind smile she gave to her visitors had vanished, with a twisted and malevolent one taking it's place.

"This was just too easy…" she quietly cackled as she changed back to her true form… The Titanium Titan!

"So Manny Rivera and Frida Suarez, you think that you have beaten me in our last encounter? Think again! Now that I have you two in my clutches, I will finally have my revenge on you two for foiling all of my other revenge plans!" he pressed a button on a remote that he summoned out of nowhere and revealed a tank that contained a giant squid concealed behind the wall.

"In all good time my monster, both Manny Rivera and Frida Suarez will be fed to you, and I will be rid of them ONCE AND FOR ALL!"

 **And that's that of part one! I hoped you liked it! As usual, feel free to review, critique, and share some ideas! Part two will be up whenever I have the time.**


	3. Hansel and Gretel Part 2

**Oh God, has a year and a half gone by already? :D Yeah, sorry about the delay, but I did say everyone that I am busy. I've been juggling school and family life more than I planned to this past year so I didn't have as much time to write as I wish I did, which also lead to a small lack of motivation. But I've got it done now!**

 **And before I continue, I would just like to say: Thank you to everyone who reviewed this fic, especially May Writer 16 who really helped me with some contributions and BlueBelle Author 1600 for giving me the motivation I needed to continue the story. I thank both of you for your support through PM messaging! Anyways, enjoy!**

Common sense never really was Manny and Frida's strongest suit, especially not with the latter. When Manny felt like they have been overstaying their welcome and still could not shake the bad feeling he had about the old lady, Frida merely shrugged off any concerns he voiced with her own justifications and the duo continued to enjoy themselves, with the old lady waiting on them hand and foot.

"Are you two enjoying yourselves?" she asked them every time she came to them, with that same permanent smile glued onto her, which the more Manny looked at, the more creepy and familiar it was getting.

"Yes, ma'am!" Manny kept his polite persona. But decided that he decided to finally act on his suggestions to leave. "You've been so nice to us, but unfortunately we gotta go!"

"Are you sure? I've got more goods coming in."

Frida opened her mouth to respond only for it to be clamped shut by Manny. "I'm very sure. Thank you for your hospitality, but we _really_ need to leave now!"

"Oh nonsense!" the old woman protested, her constant insistence getting more suspicious than the last round. "You simply _must_ stay!" suddenly, all the doors and windows clamped shut, and the lady began melting.

"Are you okay?" asked Frida reluctantly.

"Don't worry children…" the old woman grinned. "I'll be very fine… SOON!" she then shed her own form to reveal her true form. "Dun, dun, DAH!"

"The Titanium Titan?!" Manny and Frida screamed.

"Yes, Manny Rivera! I have come to get revenge on you and your obnoxious blue hair friend for foiling my previous revenge scheme!"

"Hey!" exclaimed an offended Frida.

"Well, whatever it is you're gonna do, you can forget it!" proclaimed Manny. "When my dad finds out about you kidnapping us, he's gonna go White Pantera on your sorry metal butt!"

"I don't think so," the Titanium Titan shook his "Since you two _so willingly_ approached my new hideout. I sensed your presence, so I built my churro house to lure you two in, and it worked! And now you are at my mercy!"

"I don't think so!" boasted Manny, grabbing and holding Frida besides him. He pointed his hand up in the air, getting impatient with his claws not coming out until he took a look at his bare hand. "Dang."

"Not so macho without your belt, huh?" taunted the Titan, cackling at the end, "My dreams are finally coming true, and I will be rid of you two once and for all!"

Manny and Frida groaned at their helplessness of the situation. "So, whatcha gonna do to us?" asked Frida completely deadpan.

The Titan, with his malicious grin, held up a remote. At the push of the one red button, the walls came down, revealing the aquarium that harbored the giant squid.

"Huh?" Manny and Frida eyed each other, a bit underwhelmed by the reveal. "What's the giant squid gonna do?"

"You children are mistaken," the Titan flashed his signature slasher smile,"This is no ordinary squid, this is a genetically enhanced _carnivorous_ squid, that I 'borrowed' from an undisclosed mad scientist. Anyway, this monster particularly prefers to feast on _young blood._ " Manny and Frida gulped.

"But unfortunately, you two are far too skinny to make a satisfying meal for him," the Titan tutted, shaking his head disapprovingly. "How do I make this work?" he scratched his chin ponderously for a few minutes until he snapped his fingers, "Got it!"

…

It was settled. Manny would be the first victim fed to the squid while Frida would be the servant, and once the squid was done with Manny, she would be next.

"Well, that's just peachy." Frida leaned dejectedly against the cell bars, throwing the rag that she was using to clean the floors.

"Is it just me or is he just getting crazier each time we keep seeing him?"

"Certifiably."

"Oh man, being without my powers is killing me!" Manny sulked against the wall of his cell. As if fate had taken pity on the two kids, Frida saw something shiny from the ceiling. "Manny, look!" Frida slipped her arm through the bars of the cell and grabbed Manny by the collar of his shirt, forcing him to look up.

"My belt!" Manny cried out excitedly when he saw the power source hanging from one of the beams before groaning in despair and banging his head against the bars. "Oh if I could just-" Frida held out a hand to stop Manny's regretful rambling. "Say no more." she took the rag she was holding and chucked it high enough to hit the El Tigre belt which came crashing down.

"What was that?" the sound of metal clanking on the floor alerted the Titan and he towered over his captors.

"Nothing!" the two teens replied in unison grinning nervously, their hands clasped innocently behind their backs with Frida concealing the buckle with her foot. The Titan eyed them suspiciously but did not seem any reason to investigate further. He did not even notice the leather strap of the belt on the floor underneath Frida's foot when he turned his attention to the blue-eyed girl.

"Frida dear!" Frida shuddered at the sick sing-song voice that the Titan was addressing her by. "Can you help me out with something?" Frida obediently but cautiously stepped to the Titan's direction after sliding the belt underneath Manny's cell. He spun the buckle, clasping his mouth to contain his signature transformation roar and got to picking the lock on his cell door while observing Frida keeping her distance from the Titan as he led her to a giant metal contraption. Once Frida stopped he opened the door to show her the flames fanning out through the door, prompting Manny to pick at the lock faster.

"Would you mind climbing in to see if it's hot enough?" the Titan made no effort in hiding the glee of possibly tricking the girl into burning to death. Frida rolled her eyes. She may not have been so bright, but she wasn't stupid enough to be coaxed into stepping into an obvious giant oven. She jumped when she heard the creaking of Manny opening the cell door, as did the Titan, so Frida quickly grabbed the squeaking oven door to throw him off his guard and fiddled with it as she swayed herself back and forth. "Gee, how do you do that?" the girl asked somehow still not tipping the Titan off with the rehearsed way she said it.

"Stupid girl," he muttered under his breath. "Step aside, I'll show you how it's done." As the Titan was distracted with squeezing himself through the reasonably smaller hole, Frida saw Manny walking out of the open cell ready to launch his claws into the air, acting on his friend's thumbs up for clearance.

The Titan was already halfway through the oven door before he stopped alarmingly at the sound of Manny launching his claws. "Hey, wait a minute!" Before he could make any attempt to get out Frida kicked him as hard as she could, but not hard enough to get him tumbling into the oven. Instead, he used his metal arms to propel himself out of the door, acting on the provocation that was elicited from the kick to launch one of his metal arms at Frida, pinning her to the ground with his spiky metal fingers.

"Oh no you don't!" he growled at the helpless Frida before clutching Manny who _so closely_ slipped out of his grip to get to Frida. The Titan switched between glaring at Manny and Frida with the same vengeful expression on his face.

"You two have foiled my revenge plots for the last time." his voice shook furiously. "If you two are going to be this difficult to dispose of then-" an unnatural animalistic roar interrupted the Titan's menacing tirade, and the three of them looked up to see the squid banging the glass of the tank, no doubt furious at not getting its meal yet.

"Patience I said!" the Titan snapped at the monster. "I'm trying to keep your dinner from escaping you ungrateful, slimy glob!" Seeming to understand the insult, the squid jumped out of its habitat, and instead of grabbing and crushing Manny and Frida in its tentacles, it went for the Titan, who vainly tried keeping the squid from eating him. Manny took advantage of the Titan's currently weakened state and with his El Tigre might he managed to kick the villain out of the slimy grip of the beast. Sure it may have placed Manny in the helpless position of the Titan, but getting out of the squid's grip was easy, once he wound up his claws like a power saw and started having it at the beast.

Manny's power kick had the Titan landing deeper in the opening of the oven again. Before he could even get a chance to escape, Frida propped herself on the door, swung herself with it and with the added force kicked the Titan into the oven just as she has intended before, hurriedly slamming and locking the door so that he didn't escape.

"NO!" the Titan banged on the metal door desperately. "I will get you both for this!" Frida leaned against the door waiting until his screams died down. As the girl left her post, she saw that the squid was gone, with her friend standing in its place surrounded by rolls of sushi, tossing one in its mouth.

"At least we got some real food out of all this." Manny grinned, pleased with his work.

"Let's get out of here now." Frida declared after stuffing herself with a mouthful of sushi rolls. The two of them took the food in any containers that they could find and hit the road.

 **I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Hopefully, the next one will be up soon.**


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